it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
