we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
