i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
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