Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
