Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
