There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
The best revenge is premature balding
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
