babies were throwing up all over the place
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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