escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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