Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
