I like my sex mixed with concussions.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
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