Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
