I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
