I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
