On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Mom said you looked used
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
