I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
