And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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