bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
We are two peas in an std pod
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
