Nicole vs. Life
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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