Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
