Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
birth control should be required to get into college
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
wow bdsm is so cute
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
