I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Can you bring me the toilet please
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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