I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
