It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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