Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize