So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize