I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
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