a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
