So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
