P.S. I can't hear my feet
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
