i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
