You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
