I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I think I have vodka in my lungs
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
