Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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