But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize