I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
