What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
