try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize