their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
