I think I died a long time ago.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Randomize
