Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Dignity is for republicans.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
