In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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