sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
