the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
