kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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