Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
