I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize