She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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