i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
