i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
