Cold hands, warm shart.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize