ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Someone signed my nipple.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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